I see a lot of people stating how "poor" they are but i don't think they really know what "poor" is. Poor is not owning a flat screen or a labtop or an xbox 36o or having a car on the road. Poor is having to go to a food bank every few months or having to get food stamps, poor is not buying music, games or ring tones. It is living paycheck to paycheck, not buying gifts for your spouse on holidays, not going on vacations and not going to bars and clubs. It is not having a wedding ring because you had to pawn it for milk. Poor is not having any credit and not being able to get a loan, not having good insurance or any at all (which we didn't have til obamacare kicked in. poor is not having family to ask for help.
let me add.... my "studio" is my lap as I sit indian style on my bed. and i still manage to make some pretty cool art if i do say so myself.
I should be used to this shit by now.
it seems no matter what i do to maintain a positive attitude or do the "right" thing, i just can't. I don't really mean "can't" but it is very hard to do all of the time. I truly envy those with total patience and that whatever attitude.
i know a lot of people say this - in my case it is true and those that truly know me (which is becoming fewer and fewer these days) know that i am a good guy, that is honest, loyal, passionate, genuine and trusting. These are usually put in high regard as being good traits but time and time again they have proven to be more of a curse than any gift.
some of my bad traits are stubbornness, anger and i have improvident and undisciplined behavior. I hate to say These traits have actually been more useful in many of my more desperate times and have been very beneficial to my survival. the good thing is I know, understand and have accepted these flaws, now i only need to work more on my balance and control.
yin and yang mother fucker!